You can be isolated, knocked down, lose your reputation or your business, your lover may call it a day, well many things can go wrong and consequently, you want to crawl under a rock and stay there forever! The truth is that heartbreaks, sufferings, and pain are real and part of life. By acknowledging this fact you realize that quitting or withdrawing to a dark abyss is not an option. Unless you want to be part of the honorary member of the extinction club.
Human history itself proves that positive adaptation better known as resilience is part of our survival regardless of our different predispositions or vulnerabilities. We have the courage to learn and face dire circumstances, pick up the pieces and triumph. While traumatic experiences shape our resilience, the good news is that this quality can be cultivated.
“Everyone faces up more bravely to a thing for which he has long prepared himself, sufferings, even being withstood if they have been trained for in advance.” – Seneca
What Seneca refers to is your ability to intervene and forge your resilience by conforming to Stoic philosophy. The school of thought that encourages introspective analysis into the dark web of your fears and agonies, by putting a distinction between what you can control and what you don’t have control over even more between the reality and our perception of the situation.
All this considered, whether you are currently experiencing difficult times or have undergone one, whether you are fearful of what the future has in store, employing a stoic strategy helps you cope with the challenges. Begin with picturing the worst that can happen and trust that you are capable to bounce back from the unthinkable. The idea is preparing yourself to face the unknown and what could possibly go wrong and the goal is not about being less fearful but to build courage. Basically, tapping into your inner strength and to you emplace systems to build up your resilience.
Initially reflect on your life vision, the kind of life you want to lead, where you want to be in 3 or 5 years, what is the purpose of your existence. Next, write down the significant past experiences that have shaped your emotions to understand where you are in life. For both exercises, go to self-authoring.com and use their online writing programs to explore your past, present, future by gaining a deep understanding of yourself.
Subsequently, consider exerting the following practical efforts recommended by experts in your life strategy and increase your capacity to recover from difficulties:
- Develop healthy eating habits and regular exercise to strengthen your overall health and increase the chances of better and faster recovery from injuries or sickness.
- Practice forgiveness – Nelson Mandela said: “When I walked out of the gate I knew that if I continued to hate these people I was still in prison.” Forgiveness is a necessary attitude to build resilience and not an alternative.
- Know that there is no guarantee in life, (the only guarantee is that we are mortals).
- Invest in people and relationships that are supportive and encourage you to get through hard times.
- Commit to routines – establish priorities and stay with it even when things are out of control. For instance mapping your day, being aware of the cost of the wasted time, performing tasks that are integral to your goals will weed out the act of procrastination. As your actions become your habits, you are able to restrain impulses and become less reliant on motivation and take responsibility to move forward. “Foolish are those who…have no aim to which they can direct every impulse and, indeed, every thought.” – Marcus Aurelius
- Have back up plans
- Refrain from putting all your eggs in one basket
- Transform your resentment to energy and channel it towards your goals
Featured image by Fernanda Suarez