Life has unpleasant incidents, and naturally, the pressures and pain felt from the troublesome problems or offensive behaviors often manifest through anger. An emotion that ramps up high blood pressure, stress, anxieties, and evoking hard feelings in relationships. The reasons behind this emotion depend on different situations, whether it is from being helpless to have been treated unjustly or overwhelmed and fearful. One form or another, anger is a response to pain. Still, pain is not the only reason; our thoughts, assumptions, or interpretations intensify emotion. As humans, we tend to have unrealistic and hopeful expectations, such as being understood by everyone, or everything will go as planned. Possibly our hopes shattered, and we are in for a rude awakening. This is when anger creeps in.
Anger can also happen consciously or unconsciously to distract attention from the root cause of the pain and redirecting the focus to external factors. In this situation, the pain’s ease is temporary and leaves the person vulnerable to chronic emotional distress.
Anger complicates situations. It gives the furious sense of righteousness and power a feeling of superiority without considering other perspectives. Regrettably, this perverse gratification of anger to stamp oneself as a torchbearer of moral supremacy league will use up the individual’s credibility. An uncomfortable situation commands assertiveness in response rather than aggressive behavior.
Nevertheless, anger can be used constructively once you gain insight into the reasons. In many ways, it can serve to be indeed in control of our reactions. To manage our anger in a difficult or unforeseen situation, practice three steps:
- Shift your thoughts to a neutral state. Do no associate negative motives to the person or their action.
- Observe and listen, do not lash out; it will make you look irrational.
- Be assertive and specific in expressing your feelings and expectations without offending or undermining other people’s rights to think or act differently.
In a foggy situation, when we are at most vulnerable, a little anger is the antidote. Use it wisely. If we throw a tantrum, our emotions can cloud our judgment, and we can come across as unqualified or a pain to deal with. Assertively communicate what is at stake. Like a campaigner who believes in its cause and passionately points to the injustice, take command to tell your story with conviction and rally support.
Clearly, dealing with anger or angry people is not an easy task; as long as we know that arguments, displeasures, and sadness exist and we compassionately realize that there is a reason for them, solutions appear. He knew that everyone has vulnerabilities, and it takes sound judgment to look beyond unwarranted anger. The famous story about Alexander taming Bucephalus by noticing that the famous horse was afraid of his own shadow illustrates good practicing sense. He pointed Bucephalu’s nose towards the sun and calmed the beast.